How to Maintain a Long Distance Relationship | International Dating

Learn how successful long distance couples make their relationship work

A long distance relationship is not for everyone, but while starting a long distance relationship is easy, it can be very challenging to maintain it.

You only need to sign up with a dating site or app, and you can have a handful of options for women you'd like to date, or at least have someone you can chat and interact with on a romantic level. Of course, you’ll have to meet in person to see whether you both have physical chemistry or that you can connect with each other on some level.

The next step is identifying what the nature of your relationship would be — defining the label. If you both want to be an official couple, congratulations! The next thing you’ll have to deal with is how to keep things interesting in a long distance relationship. The same thing goes for relationships formed offline where both persons involved have to deal with factors that will separate them in distance, whether it be for education, work, or if one of them lives in another part of the world and has to go back.

Ideally, people in long distance relationships must be on the same page in terms of how long they can tolerate staying that way or how often in a year can they see each other. If you’re caught in one, you may have to learn how to deal with it. Here are some of the ways you can keep your love alive despite the distance:

• Set clear boundaries.

Irrational jealousies are more likely to happen to long distance couples as one may not help but think that the other is already hanging out with others. The most common culprit for failure in this kind of relationship is a lack of trust in one partner, leading him/her to invade the virtual privacy of the other.

Setting some ground rules can help make your long distance relationship work. Have you already talked through whether your relationship is exclusive or not? It’s better that you’re both open about your level of commitment.

You can always date other girls if you are in an open relationship. But the fact that you’re willing to fight for a relationship with the woman you're currently with despite the distance shows you’ve found the right one, and you might want to spend the rest of your life with her, so you might as well focus on her and lead your relationship to a more serious level.

You have to make sure that you are both on the same page of love in the relationship; only then can you make it work.

• Make sure that you communicate regularly.

“Good morning” and “good night” messages are a must of course, but be sure that your communication is regular and with quality. You know that you’re with the right person when you spend time with her and realize that even the smallest portion of it is already so precious.

What the lack of geographical proximity compensates for is the quality of communication. Unlike any other couple who may just waste words day by day, you should take this situation to your advantage. This doesn’t mean you have to chat or call each other everyday, but that you should make each opportunity for conversation interesting.

Both mystery and absence makes the heart grow fonder, which is why you’re not obliged to talk everyday other than sending your usual day to day greetings. Keep your sense of mystery alive, but make sure that you get back to her with interesting conversation topics. To make your communication more creative, you can send each other short videos, pictures, or audio clips to make each other feel loved, remembered, and attended to, as well as make her fall in love with you over again.

Acknowledging worries about infidelity is stronger for long distance couples than those who are close to each other. Be open about how you feel as well. If you want to call or chat, reach out to her. Figure out the truth of your suspicion rather than let it fuel resentments in you. When you want to hear her voice, give her some phone calls. You simply can’t know what your partner is up to daily, so when you want to text or ask a question, then do.

Continue to fall in love with your partner even when you’re oceans apart
• Put your relationship in a positive light.

A long distance dating experience has its own drawbacks, but you should also acknowledge that it has its advantages as well. Instead of treating it as an unfortunate time in your relationship, look at it as a challenge that can help your bond become stronger.

On the other hand, couples living far from each other tend to idealize their partner. While it seems like something you should avoid in a relationship, for long distance couples, it’s the other way around. Idealizing with your partner in a healthy sense can help you keep your love for her.

However, don’t go overboard idealizing your partner; you have to remember that she isn’t perfect as well. Too much idealization can lead to an unstable relationship, and thus, a breakup. Keep things in perspective to avoid disappointments with your long distance partner, especially when you see each other again. Idealize with her, but keep things in check so that you can navigate your feelings better.

• Make it a goal to meet again.

How long can you see each other again? Make it a point to meet her from time to time. You can even give her a surprise visit. If you can’t travel to meet her face to face, you can opt to send her small gifts to make her feel appreciated. You never have to think about when to let go of a long distance relationship when you make it a point reliving why you chose each other in the very first place.

Admit it, only very few people can tolerate a long distance relationship for a long time. So it’s best that you set a goal or limit on how long you have to be far from each other. This is also the time you can determine whether your relationship is growing. If it is, then keep it that way.

Being in a long distance relationship is never easy, so let these tips help and guide you.